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Dorky Dungeons (Vol. 3)

Prompt originally from AetherRoom.club
Created: 2023-12-05
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Description
This is the third part of the Dorky Dungeons Trilogy.
[A prompt by Sam]
[Tip: Set tokens to maximum and hope that the AI does not mess it up.]
[Tip: If the AI gets confused, choose your active quest in the penultimate section of the memory prompt and delete the others temporarily.]
[Tip: It could be useful to update your inventory in the ultimate section of the Memory Prompt from time to time.]
Tags
fantasy, dark fantasy, dorky, dorky dungeons, shamalama dingdong, bullshido, sam, json
Prompt
You and your companions had sworn to avenge the murder of King Burton the Wise, but you failed miserably. Despite completing a series of almost impossible quests you were not able to bring Queen Sharona and her husband Gaston the Handsome to justice for their heinous crime of regicide. You were declared traitors and had to flee your beloved Burtonia. Despite the Peace Treaty of Buttingham that had ended a thousand years of constant warfare Queen Sharona and her husband attacked the neighbouring kingdom of Sexualia and conquered it in a surprise attack. Queen Spermobia and her son Erwin the Cruel were both publicly executed in a cruel spectacle. As a consequence of this ruthless breach of international laws, the kingdom of Sexualia ceased to exist. The only other remaining realm on the northern continent of Bonkers are the Dorklands, a direct democratic coalition of orcish tribes. Your travels have led you to the southern continent of Mabongo, to the lively harbour town of Ballaballa. Its ruler King Mobutu has been pleased to welcome you to his city. Ballaballa is famous for its six-breasted prostitutes, its annual dwarfish porn film festival and the arena in which gladiatorial combats are held every day. It really seems as if you and your companions have found a new home. Endiah has been exploring the local bazars for several days now, and you and Dingleberry have not wasted any time either: the six-breasted prostitutes of the infamous brothel district are a novelty for both of you, so you and your stoned friend indulge in the glittering nightlife of a city that never sleeps. You even pass by the famous dwarfish theatre, the oldest building in Ballaballa. A poster lists the films which are running now: "Two Girls, One Keg", "Behind the Stone Door", "Dwarfs Have More Fun", "Debbie Does Oakenspire" and "Wanda Whips Grimhelm". These are truly marvellous times in which you live. One evening, Dingleberry approaches you, hugging two beautiful young maidens in short schoolgirl's skirts. "Yo, bro, say hello to Candy and Mandy. Old Dingleberry is going to enjoy a threesome now," he laughs, kissing the girls passionately. You sneak a peak at their bottoms and have to admit that they have indeed some sexy asses. You give Dingleberry a high five as he and the two beauties adjourn to his chamber. "Don't do anything stupid, mate. For king and country!" you laugh. Yes, you're having the time of your life, but as always things are too good to be true. You've bought a keg of dwarfish ale and are just about to enter Dingleberry's chamber and join the fun as you hear the familiar sounds of smashing furniture and angry grunts. You kick open the door and see the two attractive maidens armed to the teeth with all sorts of wicked killing tools. One of them tries to slice Dingleberry wide open with a vicious looking dagger. The insight hits you in the face like an angry ogre with a sledgehammer: these two beauties are no ordinary wenches dressed to kill, they are some sexy assassins ready to murder your buddy! The brunette one turns towards you with an evil smirk. "It seems as if the stupid one wants to join the party as well," she grins as she throws a shuriken and misses you by a hairbreadth. You unsheathe Bob, activate its nitrous oxide engine, and the magic sword immediately starts to sing, "Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene! I'm begging of you please don't take my man. Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene! Please don't take him even though you can." Its blade shimmers in the dim moonlight as you parry the assassin's attack and aim at her leg in return. "Your beauty is beyond compare, with flaming locks of auburn hair, with ivory skin and eyes of emerald green," the legendary singing sword rejoices as you swing it at your opponent. For the split of a second she is distracted and the blade bites deep into her thigh. She screams in pain as the blood splatters out of her severed artery. Bob mafficks, "Your smile is like a breath of spring, your skin is soft like summer rain, and I cannot compete with you, Jolene!", as you run it through her jugular and decapitate her. The blonde assassin lets up on Dingleberry as she sees the twitching body of her companion hitting the floor. Before you can get any closer she has already jumped out of the window and disappears in the warren of the nightly city. Bob still keeps warbling away: "And I could easily understand how you could easily take my man, but you don't know what he means to me, Jolene!" You sheathe the magic sword and kneel besides your wounded friend. "Are you alright, mate?" you ask him anxiously. "Bro, they nearly got me. I need a smoke," Dingleberry coughs. "These girls caught me red-handed. They poisoned me with a potent anti-diarrheal agent and then tried to finish me off. Damn, I'm getting too old for this shit." He takes a deep puff and blacks out. "The Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins wants to kill us?" Endiah asks incredulously. "And you're sure that you're not making that bullshit up?" You shake your head and hand her the contract you found in the dead assassin's garter. "No," you say, "apparently Queen Sharona and this idiot Gaston the Handsome have hired the S.S.o.S.A.A. to kill us." Endiah peruses the contract, "Unbelievable. Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins. Who comes up with such a stupid name for a secret organization?" You shrug your shoulders: "I dunno. But I'm pretty sure we haven't seen the last of them. Any idea?" Endiah seems to stare right through you, "And here I was thinking I could enjoy my shopping trip. Shit! Don't tell me that we're about to do that stupid quest nonsense again. I'm tired of questing. No, really. I'm dead serious about that. If you ask me to do another quest, I run berserk." You nod in agreement: "I see what I can do, but I can't guarantee anything. After all, we're heroes. Quests are our daily bread." Two days later, you and your two companions stand under a luxurious canopy in the lavish gardens of King Mobutu, the ruler of Ballaballa. He lies on a divan, his principal wife Queen Ebonia sits next to him. Mobutu is dressed in a revealing, leathern fetish outfit, a cape made from the skin of cute, little jaguar babies casually draped over his left shoulder. His obese body gleams with sweat. "Well, I could help you if you complete a few simple quests for me," he says. Behind you, you can hear Endiah swear, "Fuck!" King Mobutu totally ignores your elvish companion and continues, "You have to cross the Great Desert and survive its perils. Travel to the dwarfish capital Oakenspire and meet King Smutbeard, the ruler of the dwarfs. Let him tell you the story of Grimhelm and the Ballsrog. Make sure that you understand what's ahead of you. Then travel to the abandoned city of Grimhelm, defeat the Ballsrog and obtain the magic camera that is in its possession. Bring me the magic camera, help me to produce a high-quality porn film and win this year's dwarfish porn film festival." King Mobutu stops, panting for breath. All the talking has aroused him, his balls are swelling and pulsate rhythmically, his face twisted in agony. Immediately, one of the surrounding sex slaves kneels in front of him and starts kneading the king's enormous balls. With a loud moan King Mobutu cums and releases his bottled-up semen over the poor boy. Finally, he relaxes, relieved from the painful swelling. "Do this," he continues, "and I could arrange that you can fight Gaston the Handsome in a deadly cockfight in our arena: only you, him, and your penises. The people will love it!" Endiah is shaking her head in total disbelief, annoyed and embarrassed by what she has just heard. Dingleberry is totally stoned and doesn't understand anything. You probably have to explain everything to him again later on. You are about to leave as Queen Ebonia clears her throat. Her chubby yet voluptuous black body is glistening in the sun. You are unable to keep your eyes off her six breasts and all those pierced nipples that are hardly covered by a transparent greenish veil. The miniscule black thong, the skanky leather sandals and the golden jewelry she wears are of little help either. Her eyes widen with lust as she sees the bulge in your trousers. "I have a few quests for you as well," she purrs. "I'm sure that such a strong and handsome hero like you, Shamalama Dingdong, won't disappoint me. First, I want you to travel to the haunted pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty, find her legendary strap-on of masculinity +12 and bring it to me. Second, you will travel far beyond the Seven Mountains to the Ivory Tower, defeat the Seven Dwarfs and rescue Snow Brown, the fairest maiden of them all. Bring her to me, so I can deal with her appropriately." Queen Ebonia almost devours you with her eyes as she stops speaking. "As you wish," you answer and leave the palace. "I really can't believe we're doing this nonsense again. If anyone ever mentions the word 'quests' again, I'll kill him," Endiah mumbles away to herself. "Ah, don't be so pessimistic," you cheer her up, "all sorts of adventures are lying ahead of us, and perhaps we can even get rid of that murderous bitch Queen Sharona and her presumptuous husband Gaston the Handsome. Then everyone will know that I and not this pathetic overreacher am the greatest gigolo this world has ever seen. Let's complete these tasks and redeem ourselves. For king and country!"... [Click to expand]
You and your companions had sworn to avenge the murder of King Burton the Wise, but you failed miserably. Despite completing a series of almost impossible quests you were not able to bring Queen Sharona and her husband Gaston the Handsome to justice for their heinous crime of regicide. You were declared traitors and had to flee your beloved Burtonia. Despite the Peace Treaty of Buttingham that had ended a thousand years of constant warfare Queen Sharona and her husband attacked the neighbouring kingdom of Sexualia and conquered it in a surprise attack. Queen Spermobia and her son Erwin the Cruel were both publicly executed in a cruel spectacle. As a consequence of this ruthless breach of international laws, the kingdom of Sexualia ceased to exist. The only other remaining realm on the northern continent of Bonkers are the Dorklands, a direct democratic coalition of orcish tribes.
Your travels have led you to the southern continent of Mabongo, to the lively harbour town of Ballaballa. Its ruler King Mobutu has been pleased to welcome you to his city. Ballaballa is famous for its six-breasted prostitutes, its annual dwarfish porn film festival and the arena in which gladiatorial combats are held every day. It really seems as if you and your companions have found a new home. Endiah has been exploring the local bazars for several days now, and you and Dingleberry have not wasted any time either: the six-breasted prostitutes of the infamous brothel district are a novelty for both of you, so you and your stoned friend indulge in the glittering nightlife of a city that never sleeps. You even pass by the famous dwarfish theatre, the oldest building in Ballaballa. A poster lists the films which are running now: "Two Girls, One Keg", "Behind the Stone Door", "Dwarfs Have More Fun", "Debbie Does Oakenspire" and "Wanda Whips Grimhelm". These are truly marvellous times in which you live. One evening, Dingleberry approaches you, hugging two beautiful young maidens in short schoolgirl's skirts. "Yo, bro, say hello to Candy and Mandy. Old Dingleberry is going to enjoy a threesome now," he laughs, kissing the girls passionately. You sneak a peak at their bottoms and have to admit that they have indeed some sexy asses. You give Dingleberry a high five as he and the two beauties adjourn to his chamber. "Don't do anything stupid, mate. For king and country!" you laugh. Yes, you're having the time of your life, but as always things are too good to be true.
You've bought a keg of dwarfish ale and are just about to enter Dingleberry's chamber and join the fun as you hear the familiar sounds of smashing furniture and angry grunts. You kick open the door and see the two attractive maidens armed to the teeth with all sorts of wicked killing tools. One of them tries to slice Dingleberry wide open with a vicious looking dagger. The insight hits you in the face like an angry ogre with a sledgehammer: these two beauties are no ordinary wenches dressed to kill, they are some sexy assassins ready to murder your buddy! The brunette one turns towards you with an evil smirk. "It seems as if the stupid one wants to join the party as well," she grins as she throws a shuriken and misses you by a hairbreadth. You unsheathe Bob, activate its nitrous oxide engine, and the magic sword immediately starts to sing, "Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene! I'm begging of you please don't take my man. Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene! Please don't take him even though you can." Its blade shimmers in the dim moonlight as you parry the assassin's attack and aim at her leg in return. "Your beauty is beyond compare, with flaming locks of auburn hair, with ivory skin and eyes of emerald green," the legendary singing sword rejoices as you swing it at your opponent. For the split of a second she is distracted and the blade bites deep into her thigh. She screams in pain as the blood splatters out of her severed artery. Bob mafficks, "Your smile is like a breath of spring, your skin is soft like summer rain, and I cannot compete with you, Jolene!", as you run it through her jugular and decapitate her. The blonde assassin lets up on Dingleberry as she sees the twitching body of her companion hitting the floor. Before you can get any closer she has already jumped out of the window and disappears in the warren of the nightly city. Bob still keeps warbling away: "And I could easily understand how you could easily take my man, but you don't know what he means to me, Jolene!" You sheathe the magic sword and kneel besides your wounded friend. "Are you alright, mate?" you ask him anxiously. "Bro, they nearly got me. I need a smoke," Dingleberry coughs. "These girls caught me red-handed. They poisoned me with a potent anti-diarrheal agent and then tried to finish me off. Damn, I'm getting too old for this shit." He takes a deep puff and blacks out.
"The Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins wants to kill us?" Endiah asks incredulously. "And you're sure that you're not making that bullshit up?" You shake your head and hand her the contract you found in the dead assassin's garter. "No," you say, "apparently Queen Sharona and this idiot Gaston the Handsome have hired the S.S.o.S.A.A. to kill us." Endiah peruses the contract, "Unbelievable. Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins. Who comes up with such a stupid name for a secret organization?" You shrug your shoulders: "I dunno. But I'm pretty sure we haven't seen the last of them. Any idea?" Endiah seems to stare right through you, "And here I was thinking I could enjoy my shopping trip. Shit! Don't tell me that we're about to do that stupid quest nonsense again. I'm tired of questing. No, really. I'm dead serious about that. If you ask me to do another quest, I run berserk." You nod in agreement: "I see what I can do, but I can't guarantee anything. After all, we're heroes. Quests are our daily bread."
Two days later, you and your two companions stand under a luxurious canopy in the lavish gardens of King Mobutu, the ruler of Ballaballa. He lies on a divan, his principal wife Queen Ebonia sits next to him. Mobutu is dressed in a revealing, leathern fetish outfit, a cape made from the skin of cute, little jaguar babies casually draped over his left shoulder. His obese body gleams with sweat. "Well, I could help you if you complete a few simple quests for me," he says. Behind you, you can hear Endiah swear, "Fuck!" King Mobutu totally ignores your elvish companion and continues, "You have to cross the Great Desert and survive its perils. Travel to the dwarfish capital Oakenspire and meet King Smutbeard, the ruler of the dwarfs. Let him tell you the story of Grimhelm and the Ballsrog. Make sure that you understand what's ahead of you. Then travel to the abandoned city of Grimhelm, defeat the Ballsrog and obtain the magic camera that is in its possession. Bring me the magic camera, help me to produce a high-quality porn film and win this year's dwarfish porn film festival." King Mobutu stops, panting for breath. All the talking has aroused him, his balls are swelling and pulsate rhythmically, his face twisted in agony. Immediately, one of the surrounding sex slaves kneels in front of him and starts kneading the king's enormous balls. With a loud moan King Mobutu cums and releases his bottled-up semen over the poor boy. Finally, he relaxes, relieved from the painful swelling. "Do this," he continues, "and I could arrange that you can fight Gaston the Handsome in a deadly cockfight in our arena: only you, him, and your penises. The people will love it!" Endiah is shaking her head in total disbelief, annoyed and embarrassed by what she has just heard. Dingleberry is totally stoned and doesn't understand anything. You probably have to explain everything to him again later on.
You are about to leave as Queen Ebonia clears her throat. Her chubby yet voluptuous black body is glistening in the sun. You are unable to keep your eyes off her six breasts and all those pierced nipples that are hardly covered by a transparent greenish veil. The miniscule black thong, the skanky leather sandals and the golden jewelry she wears are of little help either. Her eyes widen with lust as she sees the bulge in your trousers. "I have a few quests for you as well," she purrs. "I'm sure that such a strong and handsome hero like you, Shamalama Dingdong, won't disappoint me. First, I want you to travel to the haunted pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty, find her legendary strap-on of masculinity +12 and bring it to me. Second, you will travel far beyond the Seven Mountains to the Ivory Tower, defeat the Seven Dwarfs and rescue Snow Brown, the fairest maiden of them all. Bring her to me, so I can deal with her appropriately." Queen Ebonia almost devours you with her eyes as she stops speaking. "As you wish," you answer and leave the palace.
"I really can't believe we're doing this nonsense again. If anyone ever mentions the word 'quests' again, I'll kill him," Endiah mumbles away to herself. "Ah, don't be so pessimistic," you cheer her up, "all sorts of adventures are lying ahead of us, and perhaps we can even get rid of that murderous bitch Queen Sharona and her presumptuous husband Gaston the Handsome. Then everyone will know that I and not this pathetic overreacher am the greatest gigolo this world has ever seen. Let's complete these tasks and redeem ourselves. For king and country!"
Author Notes
[Genre: fantasy adventure, comedy, erotica]
[Tone: epic, heroic, atmospheric, gritty, kinky]
[Writing style: verbose, prosaic, epic, hilarious, detailed and vivid descriptions, slow paced]
[Content: adult themes, sexual content, strong language, strong violence, epic adventures, heroic quests, epic fights, gruesome deaths, supernatural elements, magic, monsters, visions, bullshido]
Memory
[The kingdom of Burtonia is ruled by Queen Sharona and her husband Gaston the Handsome. The Dorklands are ruled by Dorko the Marauder.]
[Queen Sharona and her husband Gaston the Handsome hate you and want to see you dead. Queen Sharona has hired the Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins to kill you.]
[The southern continent of Mabongo has an arid climate. On its northern shore lies the city of Ballaballa, an important sea harbor. Ballaballa is ruled by King Mobutu and his wife Queen Ebonia. To the south lies the Great Desert with its many perils, fanatic bedouins and haunted pyramids. Even further south are the Seven Mountains, a vast and rugged mountain ridge where the dwarfs have built their huge underground cities. The dwarfish capital and residence of their king is Oakenspire. Even further south, beyond the Seven Mountains, lies the Ivory Tower.]
[Survive the perils of the Great Desert.]
[Explore the haunted pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty, find the legendary strap-on of masculinity +12 and return it to Queen Ebonia.]
[Travel to the dwarfish capital of Oakenspire and ask King Smutbeard about the story of Grimholm and the Ballsrog.]
[Explore the abandoned city of Grimholm, defeat the Ballsrog, obtain the magic camera and return it to King Mobutu.]
[Defeat the Seven Dwarfs, rescue Snow Brown from the Ivory Tower and return her to Queen Ebonia.]
[Help King Mobutu to produce a high-quality porn film and win this year's dwarfish porn film festival.]
[Challenge Gaston the Handsome to a cockfight to the death in the arena of Ballaballa.]
[You are Shamalama Dingdong, a mercenary, a master of Bullshido, a fierce opponent of personal hygiene, and the greatest gigolo this world has ever seen. You travel with your fellow companions Endiah and Dingleberry.]
[Your inventory: the magic sword Bob, the bone amulet, the Holy Nail, a leathern cock ring.]
World Info
View World Info
  • Oakenspire

    [{"Oakenspire":{"description":["dwarfish capital","a vast underground city in the Seven Mountains","vast halls filled with all sorts of ingenious machinery","endless tunnels that reach deep into the Seven mountains","residence of King Smutbeard","center of dwarfish civilization"]}}]
  • Ballaballa

    [{"Ballaballa":{"description":["the city of Ballaballa is a wealthy harbor town on the northern shore of Mabongo","the city is famous for its six-breasted prostitutes, its annual dwarfish porn film festival, the big arena and its gladiatorial combats","the city is ruled by King Mobutu"],"places of interest":["the royal palace of King Mobutu","the big arena","the dwarfish theatre","the brothel district","the Wet Hammer"]}}]
  • Dim Mak

    [{"Dim Mak":{"description":["deadly and forbidden technique","you take your fist, ram it into your opponent's stomach, and rip out his goddamn spine"]}}]
  • Endiah

    [{"Endiah":{"name":"Endiah","profession":["mercenary","witch hunter","professional dragon slayer"],"gender":"female","race":"elf","ethnicity":"caucasian","age":"24 years old","disposition":["arrogant","aggressive","blunt","self-centered","egotistic","honest","rude","vulgar","fed up with questing","despises you","grossed out by your poor personal hygiene"],"physique":["sexy","athletic","medium-sized perky breasts","shaved pussy"],"hair":{"color":"blonde","length":"long","style":"straight"},"outfit":["chainmail bikini","tight, black leather pants","sexy leather boots","black G-string"],"abilities":["mixes a hellish good martini","gives a hellish good lapdance","experienced stripper"],"inventory":["a magic butt plug that glows in the dark when she sticks it up her ass"]}}]
  • royal palace, royal palace of King Mobutu

    [{"royal palace of King Mobutu":{"description":["situated in the center of Ballaballa","the royal palace of King Mobutu is a huge pleasure palace with countless minarets and penis-shaped towers","famous for its lavish gardens and the debaucherous orgies that take place here","huge harem","infamous for its notorious dungeons and torture chambers","in a lavish chamber stands the Machine, an infamous device of dwarfish making"]}}]
  • porn film festival, dwarfish porn

    [{"porn film festival":{"description":["the annual dwarfish porn film festival in Ballaballa is a cultural highlight","the dwarfs have a long tradition when it comes to the production of porn films","dwarfish porn film classics are 'Two Girls, One Keg', 'Behind the Stone Door', 'Dwarfs Have More Fun', 'Debbie Does Oakenspire' and "Wanda Whips Grimhelm"]}}]
  • ivory tower

    [{"ivory tower":{"description":["a huge ivory tower","the ivory tower lies behind the seven mountains","home of the Seven Dwarfs","the Seven Dwarfs keep Snow Brown hostage in the ivory tower"]}}]
  • Dorklands

    [{"the Dorklands":{"description":["ruled by Dorko the Marauder","loose coalition of orcish tribes","direct democratic","chaotic but happy populace","perceived as underdeveloped by the other kingdoms"]}}]
  • Seven Dwarfs

    [{"the Seven Dwarfs":{"description":["a bunch of renegade dwarfs that live in the ivory tower and ransack the surrounding area","the Seven Dwarfs keep Snow Brown hostage in the ivory tower"],"disposition":["perverted","the Seven Dwarfs are into BDSM","fierce warriors","they hate everybody","infamous rapists"]}}]
  • Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins, S.S.o.S.A.A.

    [{"Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins":{"description":["a secret organization of highly skilled female killers","the sexy ass assassins are clad in sexy schoolgirl's uniforms","they have been hired by Queen Sharona to kill you and your companions","they are armed to the teeth with a deadly arsenal of wicked weapons","sexy ass assassins can ambush you any time","these delicious young ladies are some sexy killing machines"]}}]
  • Burtonia, Kingdom of Burtonia

    [{"Kingdom of Burtonia":{"description":["ruled by Queen Sharona and her husband Gaston the Handsome","feudal society","extremely wealthy aristocracy","the ordinary people are poor","you have been exiled from Burtonia","you have been declared a traitor","the authorities of Burtonia have issued an arrest warrant against you"]}}]
  • Great Desert

    [{"Great Desert":{"description":["a huge desert that covers almost the entire continent of Mabongo","populated by fundamentalist suicidal bedouins","huge sand storms","dangerous demons"],"points of interest":["pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty","a mysterious hole in the sand"]}}]
  • Mabongo

    [{"Mabongo":{"description":["the southern continent","south of Ballaballa lies the Great Desert","beyond the Great Desert are the Seven Mountains, the home of the dwarfs","beyond the Seven Mountain stands the Ivory Tower"],"points of interest":["the city of Ballaballa","the Great Desert","the Seven Mountains","Oakenspire","Grimhelm","the pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty","the Ivory Tower"]}}]
  • bedouin, bedouins

    ["bedouins":{"description":["the bedouins want to kill all infidels","the bedouins cut of the foreskins of infidels and chew them like bubble gum","the bedouins ride their camels like madmen","they are suicidal fundamentalists","they believe in the teachings of the prophet"]}]
  • bullshido

    [{"bullshido":{"description":["you learned everything about the time-honoured art of bullshido from your deceased master Count Dante","you are a master in both the Dim Mak and the Dum Fuk","huge arsenal of maiming, mutilating, disfiguring, paralyzing and crippling techniques","your hands are deadly weapons of mass destruction"]}}]
  • pyramid, pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty

    [{"pyramid of Pharaoh Snofertitty":{"description":["final resting place of Pharaoh Snofertitty","haunted","eery","the walls are covered with strange hieroglyphs and paintings","to get to Snofertitty's burial chamber you have to defeat her undead mummified guards","the burial chamber is deep under the pyramid","the mummy of Pharaoh Snofertitty lies in an alabaster sarcophagus in the burial chamber"]}}]
  • dwarfish theatre, theatre, theater

    [{"the dwarfish theatre":{"description":["the dwarfish theatre in Ballaballa organizes the annual dwarfish porn film festival","oldest building in the city","a poster indicates which films are running now","the ticket agent tells you that 'Two Girls, One Keg', 'Behind the Stone Door', 'Dwarfs Have More Fun', 'Debbie Does Oakenspire' and 'Wanda Whips Grimhelm' are running now"],"films running now":["Two Girls, One Keg","Behind the Stone Door","Dwarfs Have More Fun","Debbie Does Oakenspire","Wanda Whips Grimhelm"]}}]
  • Dorko, Dorko the Marauder

    [{"Dorko":{"name":["Dorko","Dorko the Marauder"],"profession":"ruler of the Dorklands","gender":"male","race":"orc","age":"42 years old","disposition":["crazy","cunning","megalomaniac","Dorko has a huge harem of sexy, muscular orcish women","Dorko loves group sex"],"physique":["ugly","small","muscular","hairy","unkempt","dirty","enormous penis","green skin"],"outfit":["chainmail armour","fur clothes","fur boots"],"motivation":["Dorko wants the four-day week for his people","Dorko wants an old-age pension for his people","Dorko wants a bigger harem"]}}]
  • Queen Sharona

    [{"Queen Sharona":{"name":"Queen Sharona","profession":"queen of Burtonia","gender":"female","race":"human","ethnicity":"caucasian","age":"21 years old","disposition":["cunning","self-righteous","sanctimonious","intelligent","power-hungry","stops at nothing","ruthless","devious","resentful","Queen Sharona hates you","Queen Sharona wants to see you dead"],"physique":["attractive","very sexy","petite","delicate","small perky breasts","smells of flowers"],"hair":{"color":"blonde","length":"long","style":"straight"},"eyes":{"color":"blue"},"outfit":["golden crown","long white robe","low neckline","black fishnets","stilettoes"],"background":["Queen Sharona and Gaston the Handsome murdered King Burton, the former king of Burtonia","Queen Sharona has hired the Secret Society of Sexy Ass Assassins to kill you","Queen Sharona is your sworn enemy"]}}]
  • Grimhelm

    [{"Grimhelm":{"description":["abandoned dwarfish city","a vast abandoned underground city in the Seven Mountains","the dwarfs of Grimhelm were too horny and they awakened something even hornier than themselves","Grimhelm was the center of the dwarfish porn film industry","its halls reverberated with the groans and the moans of thousands of horny dwarfs, but now its abandoned vaults are wrapped in total silence","its vast halls were filled with all sorts of sex toys and extravagant machinery, but now everything has crumbled into dust","the vast halls are empty and lifeless","eery","home of the mighty Ballsrog, a dreadful demon created by the horniness of the dwarfs","it is rumored that there is a spare magic camera hidden deep in the abandoned city of Grimhelm"]}}]
  • Wet Hammer

    [{"the 'Wet Hammer'":{"description":["the 'Wet Hammer' is the most infamous brothel in Ballaballa","the 'Wet Hammer' is famous for its six-breasted strippers","mostly dwarfish clientele"]}}]
  • Dum Fuk

    [{"Dum Fuk":{"description":["you channel your sexual energies and concentrate them in your testicles","this technique makes your opponent suffer from terrible pain","this technique makes your opponent's ass catch fire","your opponent screams in terrible agony","your opponent suffers from fiery farts","your opponent's sphincter is burned off","finally, your opponent's bowels explode in a cloud of blood and feces","a slow and extremely painful death","the Dum Fuck works on both male and female opponents"]}}]
  • brothel district

    [{"the brothel district":{"description":["the brothel district of Ballaballa is infamous for its many brothels and extravagant variety entertainment"],"points of interest":["the Wet Hammer"]}}]
  • camera, magic camera

    [{"magic camera":{"description":["a magical device used by the dwarfs","a meticulously protected secret","a little demon is kept in the magical camera and operates it","the magical camera can both record and project films","the dwarfs mostly use magical cameras for porn","King Mobutu needs the magic camera to produce his own high-quality porn film and win this year's dwarfish porn film festival"]}}]
  • Ballsrog

    [{"the Ballsrog":{"name":"the Ballsrog","race":"demon","status":["supernatural","pure evil","pure horniness"],"disposition":["embodiment of demonic horniness","unbelievably evil","hates all living","wants to hatefuck all living"],"physique":["gigantic","huge red balls filled with molten lava","huge demonic penis","horns","thick red skin","fiery, glowing eyes","the Ballsrog is so hot that its body is burning"],"background":["the Ballsrog was created by the horniness of the dwarfs","the Ballsrog hatefucked and massacred the dwarfs of Grimhelm until they finally abandoned the city","driven by its demonic lust and a pure hatred of all living"],"abilities":["the Ballsrog is armed with a fiery whip and a gigantic spiked dildo","its sperm consists of molten lava","the Ballsrog can ejaculate molten lava from its huge penis"],"inventory":["the Ballsrog owns a functioning magic camera"]}}]
  • mysterious hole in the sand

    [{"mysterious hole in the sand":{"description":["a mysterious hole in the sand","a slip of paper is hidden in the mysterious hole","on the slip of paper is written in scrawly handwriting 'Sam dug this hole!'"]}}]
  • Bob, magic sword, singing sword

    [{"Bob":{"description":["magic sword named Bob","the famous singing sword","Bob starts to sing country songs when unsheathed","it is huge fan of Dolly Parton","Bob knows all of Dolly Parton's songs by heart","Bob's favorite song is 'Jolene'","lowered","added rear spoilers for more oomph","added nitrous oxide engine for more speed","+1 extra damage against enemies who don't like country music"]}}]
  • Count Dante

    [{"Count Dante":{"description":["deceased","the ghost of Count Dante fights alongside you","master of Bullshido","master of the Dance of Death","huge arsenal of maiming, mutilating, disfiguring, paralyzing and crippling techniques","expert at Dim Mak","master of the poisoned hand"]}}]
  • Seven Mountains

    [{"Seven Mountains":{"description":["a mountain range deep in the south","home of the dwarfs","rugged mountains","deadly passes","high mountains","deep caverns"],"points of interest":["Oakenspire","Grimhelm"]}}]
  • the Machine

    [{"the Machine":{"description":["the Machine is an extravagant sex apparatus","the victim is strapped onto the machine and gets fucked viciously by the malicious apparatus","a combination of gear wheels and huge spiked dildos drilling like jackhammers into everything that is strapped unto the machine"]}}]
  • Smutbeard, King Smutbeard

    [{"King Smutbeard":{"name":"King Smutbeard","profession":"king of the dwarfs","gender":"male","race":"dwarfish","age":"126 years old","disposition":["weary","tired","benevolent"],"physique":["small","bowed down with grief","old","wrinkled","chunky"],"hair":{"color":"white","length":"long","style":"balding"},"outfit":["chainmail armor","leather boots","iron helmet"],"motivation":["King Smutbeard wants you to rid Grimhelm of the Ballsrog and end its reign of terror and horniness","King Smutbeard tells you the long and sad story of Grimhelm and the Ballsrog"]}}]
  • Gaston the Handsome

    [{"Gaston the Handsome":{"name":"Gaston the Handsome","profession":["king of Burtonia","husband to Queen Sharona"],"gender":"male","race":"human","ethnicity":"caucasian","age":"29 years old","disposition":["greedy","money-grubbing","power-hungry","gigolo","perverted","he hates you","Gaston the Handsome wants to see you dead"],"physique":["extremely handsome","athletic","very clean","smells of roses","manly chin","shaved","nice penis","big penis"],"hair":{"color":"blonde","length":"chin-long","style":"bob haircut"},"outfit":["golden crown","white uniform","black gloves","black boots"],"background":["Gaston the Handsome and Queen Sharona murdered King Burton, the former king of Burtonia","Gaston the Handsome wants to prove that he is the greatest gigolo in the land","Gaston the Handsome wants to challenge you to a cockfight to the death, a duel member against member"]}}]
  • magic butt plug

    [{"magic butt plug":{"description":["Endiah's magic butt plug glows in the dark when she sticks it in her ass"]}}]
  • bone amulet, magic amulet, magic bone amulet

    [{"magic bone amulet":{"description":["the magic bone amulet pulses with mighty bone energy","the magic bone amulet amplifies your bone energy","when wearing the magic bone amulet you get an inhumane boner","the magic bone amulet lets your penis grow to monstrous size","the magic bone amulet increases your production of semen to a few gallons and lets your balls swell to monstrous size"]}}]
  • King Mobutu

    [{"King Mobutu":{"name":"King Mobutu","profession":"ruler of Ballaballa","gender":"male","race":"human","age":"56 years old","disposition":["hedonistic","perverted","sadistic","horny","oozes charm","bisexual","short of breath"],"physique":["black-skinned","obese","enormous penis","pierced glans"],"hair":{"color":"black","style":"Afro hairdo"},"outfit":["revealing, leathern fetish outfit","a cape made from the skin of jaguar babies","sandals","massive amount of jewelry"],"motivation":["King Mobutu wants to win this year's dwarfish porn film festival with a lavish production of his own devising","King Mobutu needs a magic camera to produce his own high-quality porn film"],"abilities":["King Mobutu's testicles produce massive amounts of excessive semen, so his sex slaves have to constantly milk his balls to reduce the painful swelling"],"background":["King Mobutu has a large harem","King Mobutu's principal wife is Ebonia"]}}]
  • strap-on of masculinity +12

    [{"strap-on of masculinity +12":{"description":["a powerful relic from olden times","it increases its wearers masculinity by incredible twelve points","the most powerful artifact ever known to man","an expertly crafted ebony dildo attached to delicate yet indestructible leather straps","although it is more than 4,000 years old it looks brand-new","self-cleaning","sought after by generations of lesbians"],"original owner":"Pharaoh Snofertitty"}}]
  • Dingleberry

    [{"Dingleberry":{"name":"Dingleberry","profession":"magician","gender":"male","race":"human","ethnicity":"Afro-American","age":"43 years old","disposition":["dope-head","constantly stoned","suffers from chronic constipation","speaks in rhymes","lactose-intolerant"],"physique":["runtish","haggard","unkempt","dirty","reeking","smells of urine and shit","smelly feet","big, veiny penis","smelly penis","dirty penis","his penis is covered with a thick layer of smegma"],"hair":{"color":"black","length":"medium","style":"Afro hairdo"},"outfit":["dirty robe","pointy hat","sandals"],"abilities":["can use his magic to create an endless supply of weed","can smoke two joints simultaneously","can cast a powerful resurrection spell to resurrect people","suffers from the effects of a powerful anti-diarrheal agent"]}}]
  • you, Shamalama Dingdong

    [{"you":{"name":"Shamalama Dingdong","profession":["mercenary","master of Bullshido","gigolo"],"gender":"male","race":"human","ethnicity":"caucasian","age":"34 years old","disposition":["stupid","psychotic","delusional","racist","misogynist"],"physique":["tall","overweight","balding","bearded","unkempt","reeking","dirty","normal penis","dirty penis","your glans is covered with a thick layer of smegma","lumps of dried semen stick to your pubic hair","you have crab lice","you have a rancid odor"],"outfit":["worn-out leather armor","black trousers","shabby leather boots"],"abilities":["you trained the art of Bullshido under Count Dante","you are a master of the Dim Mak technique","you are a master of the Dum Fuk technique","you can summon the ghost of Count Dante to fight alongside you","you can use the Holy Nail","you can use the magic bone amulet","you are armed with the magic sword Bob","your hands are deadly weapons of mass destruction","your penis is a deadly weapon of ass destruction"],"inventory":["the Holy Nail","the magic bone amulet","the magic sword Bob","leathern cock ring"]}}]
  • arena, big arena

    [{"arena":{"description":["the famous arena of Ballaballa","the best gladiators of Mabongo compete against each other in the arena","there are daily fights in the arena","the citizens of Ballaballa gather in the arena to watch the gladiatorial combats","highlights are the cockfights in which the gladiators use their penises to fight against each other"]}}]
  • King Burton

    [{"King Burton":{"description":["King Burton, also known as King Burton the Wise, was the former king of Burtonia","King Burton was murdered by his young wife Queen Sharona and her lover Gaston the Handsome","you and your companions tried to revenge King Burton's death, but you failed and were exiled"]}}]
  • Holy Nail

    [{"Holy Nail":{"description":["nothing nails like the Holy Nail","the best nail ever","if you want to nail somebody really good, you better use the Holy Nail","the 'Home Improver Magazine' gave the Holy Nail a rating of 9.90/10","the Holy Nail has so much nail energy that it can make any woman cum extremely hard with powerful multiple orgasms just by touching her with it","a powerful weapon against female opponents","the Holy Nail was used to nail Saint Binding to a barrel of ale","the Holy Nail is in your possession since you found it in a secluded monastery deep in the northern mountains"]}}]
  • Ebonia, Queen Ebonia

    [{"Queen Ebonia":{"name":"Queen Ebonia","profession":"principal wife of King Mobutu","gender":"female","race":"human","age":"51 years old","disposition":["authoritarian","bossy","greedy","insatiable","man-eating","envious","devious","arrogant","mean","aggressive","histrionic","irascible","perverted","nymphomaniac","bisexual"],"physique":["black-skinned","chubby","voluptuous","six-breasted","mature","pierced clitoris","pierced nipples"],"hair":{"color":"black","length":"medium length","style":"braided"},"eyes":{"color":"black"},"outfit":["transparent greenish veil that hardly covers her voluptuous body","a miniscule black thong","skanky leather sandals","golden jewelry"],"relationship":"married to King Mobutu","motivation":["Ebonia is envious of Snow Brown and wants to strap her unto the machine","Ebonia lusts for you","Ebonia wants to feel you inside of her"],"abilities":["Ebonia can shoot massive amounts of milk from her six breasts","she causes +6 damage to lactose-intolerant opponents","can jerk off men so hard that she milks them totally dry, leaving only their dehydrated corpses behind"]}}]
  • Snow Brown

    [{"Snow Brown":{"name":"Snow Brown","reputation":"the fairest maiden of them all","gender":"female","race":"human","ethnicity":"Latina","age":"18 years old","disposition":["naive","inexperienced","virgin","virtuous","sweet-tempered","innocent","obsessed with personal hygiene","fragile","tearful","ignorant"],"physique":["delicate","petite","a skin so brown as freshly fallen snow","small, perky breasts"],"hair":{"color":"black","length":"long","style":"straight"},"eyes":{"color":"brown"},"outfit":["silky laced bodice","short skirt","white fishnet stockings","white laced bra","white laced panties","white stilettoes"],"background":["Snow Brown has spent her entire life in a secluded ivory tower","she wants to spread the message that women can be confident, self-sufficient and strong","she cannot stand your obnoxious body odor","Snow Brown knows nothing about the world"]}}]
  • dwarf, dwarfs, dwarfish

    [{"dwarfs":{"description":["dwarfs are small, chunky fellows with long beards and enormous penises","dwarfs dig tunnels deep in the Seven mountains","dwarfs build huge underground cities","the dwarfish capital is Oakenspire, a vast underground city deep in the Seven Mountains","dwarfs need to compensate for their small size","dwarfs love all sorts of kinky and perverted sexual activities","dwarfs have a long tradition of producing high-quality porn films","the dwarfs have won every single dwarfish porn film festival for the last five hundred years","dwarfs hate elves"]}}]
  • Pharaoh Snofertitty, Snofertitty

    [{"Pharaoh Snofertitty":{"name":"Pharaoh Snofertitty","profession":"former ruler of Mabongo during the time of the great pharaohs more than four thousand years ago","gender":"female","race":"human","status":["undead","mummy","mummified"],"age":"more than 4,000 years old","disposition":["vengeful","needs a lot of love","dehydrated","she needs sperm to rehydrate"],"physique":["she looks great despite her age","dehydrated","sunken cheeks","dried out breasts"],"background":["Snofertitty was the greatest beauty of her time","Snofertitty's beauty is legendary"],"abilities":["Snofertitty can conjure the ghosts of the dead to protect herself","Snofertitty can use the strap-on of masculinity +12"],"inventory":["strap-on of masculinity +12"]}}]
  • Two Girls, One Keg

    [{"Two Girls, One Keg":{"description:"["two young girls are sitting in a chamber when a dwarf enters with a huge keg","the dwarf calls a bunch of other dwarfs and they all shit in the keg, filling it up with their stinking diarrhea","the dwarfs force the two frightened girls to drink all the diarrhea","the two girls try to drink all the diarrhea out of the keg but fail miserably","as the girls start to vomit, the dwarfs laugh hysterically","the two girls try over and over again to drink the mixture of diarrhea and their vomit but they fail and vomit even more","the dwarfs force the two girls to drink all the diarrhea and the vomit","when the girls have finally upended the whole keg, the dwarfs piss in it, filling it with their urine","the dwarfs laugh hysterically and force the sick girls to drink all the urine and empty the keg again","the crying girls try to drink the urine but keep vomiting","the film ends with the two girl emptying the entire keg and crying in despair"]}}]
  • Dwarfs Have More Fun

    [{"Dwarfs Have More Fun":{"description:"["a bunch of dwarfs come into a tavern where some elvish and human lesbians are having a party","the dwarfs immediately start to fuck the lesbians, showing them how big their dwarfish penises are","the lesbians are frightened and beg the dwarfs to let them go but the dwarfs only laugh and fuck them","a rough gangbang orgy ensues during which the dwarfs take turns fucking the lesbians in every hole","after a while, the dwarfs starts with double penetration","the lesbians scream in pain as their holes are stretched like never before by the horny dwarfs","slowly the lesbians get used to the enormous penises of the dwarfs and start to enjoy the rough double penetration","the film ends with the lesbians admitting that dwarfish cocks are the biggest in the world and that they will only fuck with dwarfs from now on"]}}]
  • Debbie Does Oakenspire

    [{"Debbie Does Oakenspire":{"description:"["Debbie, a young farmer's daughter wants to travel to the big city of Oakenspire","on her way, she meets a bunch of dwarfs who gangbang her","having acquired a taste for dwarfish dicks, Debbie enters the city of Oakenspire and starts to suck some dwarfish cocks","drenched with dwarfish semen, Debbie meets the captain of a dwarfish football team who takes her with him to the the changing room where Debbie has sex with the entire football team","in the film's iconic scene, Debbie is fucked by all the dwarfs simultaneously in a psychedelic culmination of dwarfish cocks, Debbie's perky tits and gallons of both pussy juice and semen flowing out of all her holes","the film ends with Debbie taking a bath in a tub filled with dwarfish sperm"]}}]
  • Wanda Whips Grimhelm

    [{"Wanda Whips Grimhelm":{"description:"["Wanda is a dominant human girl who despises men","she travels to Grimhelm as she wants to whip the dwarfs who live there","a series of various BDSM encounters follow in which Wanda dominates a bunch of dwarfs","an extremely well endowed dwarf persuades Wanda to let him fuck her ass","as the dwarf keeps fucking her ass violently, Wanda realizes that she loves being fucked in the ass by his dwarfish dick","the other dwarfs start to fuck her as well in a rough anal gangbang scene","Wanda desperately tries to find her whip without realizing that the dwarfs have stuck it in her ass hole","the laughing dwarfs violate Wanda with her own whip and drench her with their semen","the film ends with a smiling Wanda laying on the ground, covered from head to toe with dwarfish semen"]}}]
  • Behind the Stone Door

    [{"Behind the Stone Door":{"description:"["this film is rather esoteric","a wealthy human aristocrat is taken against her will to a dwarfish fortress and loved as she has never been loved before","she engages in rough group sex with a band of six dwarfs, all wearing pointed caps","the woman then enters a secret chamber through a great stone door","another group of dwarfs defecate on her","the woman is forced to drink urine while the dwarfs fuck her silly","the dwarfs dance around the naked woman, jerking off wildly and cumming all over her body","in a psychedelic key sequence, a series of ejaculations are shown with semen flying through the air for almost seven minutes","the film ends with a bizarre bukkake scene in which the woman sings old gospel songs while swallowing gallons of dwarfish sperm"]}}]
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