"Eeeh... aren't you a little young to get into adventuring, kid?" The receptionist peered a bit over the desk to examine me. She saw a fresh-faced boy, age hard to exactly pinpoint past "far too young" with freckles across his nose.
I mustered convincing enthusiasm, bouncing on heels as I clutched my coin purse full of money. "Well, my grandpa's been training me since forever! And look, I'm really responsible and everything!" I lifted the coin purse, jangling it. "I can pay for the pass, so what's the big deal?"
The receptionist sighed and sat back down, returning to her paperwork. "Look, kiddo, if you got family approval I guess we have to give you one, but," she glanced up, staring sharply, "to answer your question, the 'big deal' is that you might die horribly out there." She returned to writing, dipping the quill in an inkwell. "There are monsters and bandits out there ready to eat kids like you whole. Are you sure you're prepared for that?"
I tapped my chin, pausing for a few moments, before excitedly announcing, "Yes!"
"Alright then." She rolled up some official looking paper and slipped it into a tube. "Gimme your proof of payment." I placed the coin purse onto the table. She weighed it in one hand, checking its heft, before swapping it with the official registration. "Oh, and one more thing. Because of your... youthful disposition," she said those words with slight distaste, "you'll need adult supervision while exploring outside the city. If you try going off alone without adult supervision," she pointed at a board of wanted posters just beside us, "we'll consider you a runaway brat and take the permit back from your corpse, so be sure to take your grandpa or whoever approved you along, okay?"
"...Grandpa? But he's way too old..." I muttered, disappointed. "Isn't there anyone else I can adventure with?"
She shrugged. "Talk to some other adventurers through the guild tavern area, I dunno." She gestured around. "If you can convince someone here to babysit they're more than welcome to."
"Babysit?!" I puffed my cheeks indignantly, fists balled.
"I did questing for, what, 15 years? When you've been doing this gig so long they make you sit around doing paperwork instead, everyone under 20 looks like a damn toddler." She smirked. "You can ask around though. Who knows, maybe there's some nice old couple willing to keep a weather eye on ya. Now buzz off, I got forms to fill, you little pest."
"Grr... fine!" I stomped away from the reception desk, making a big show of how upset I was at being called a toddler by an old lady by blowing raspberries and waving my arms angrily. I stomped into the guild tavern proper, filled with boisterous grown ups laughing it up, talking loudly about their escapades, or drowsy after an expedition and getting hammered. I tried not to gawk - these people were pretty gross, drinking was never something grandpa let me do (he once said I'd rot my gut from the inside out) - but I didn't have time for sightseeing. There had to be someone who could adventure with me! I made it a few steps further before I heard a shrill, excited squeal directly behind me followed by a pair of hands firmly squishing against my chest. "Kyaaa~! It's a boy~! A cute wittle baby boy~!" The hands felt around my body eagerly, squeezing and kneading.
I yelped, "Hey! Cut that out!" and turned around, finding a woman grinning wide with pink cheeks, clearly tipsy judging by the smell of beer wafting off her breath. Her blonde hair was unkempt, messy, falling to her shoulders in waves, and her armor was... well, her class was clearly some kind of knight, but she wasn't wearing a breastplate. All she had on above the waist were two shoulderpads with fur trim and a tiny metal bikini top barely containing enormous bouncy boobs. Below the belt wasn't much better - she wore armored boots and gauntlets, leggings with lots of holes and tears, but no pants whatsoever and instead sporting a loincloth with way too much flapping cloth to cover any important bits. Glimpses of an impressively curvy rear were clear whenever she shifted position or fidgeted, causing her loincloth to sway like a skirt in strong winds. For all intents and purposes this woman looked more like some drunken barbarian than a knight, even carrying a giant mace around casually as she fondled me. I tried to pull away, only for her to wrap her free arm around me, keeping me trapped as she groped. "Lemme go already, jeeze!"
"Awwww," she cooed, ignoring my complaints, "where's your mommy, baby boy? Did she lose you? Let Alyssa help you find her!" Her eyes brightened as she gasped, jaw dropping, almost shaking me excitedly. "Ooh! Is that a...! Oh my god, it is! Eeee!" she drunkenly squealed again, pointing at my registration parchment sticking out of my bag, "you're a new little adventurer~!" She squeezed me tightly, pulling me flush against her voluptuous chest, smothering me between pillowy cushions. "Oh you precious baby boy, let Alyssa help you on your adventures! You need someone else to protect you, ri~ght?! Mommy Alyssa will take care of you!"
"Wha... hey!" I struggled to escape her grasp. "You're not my mom! Stop it already!"
She giggled. "Sorry, sorry, mommy Alyssa got a bit ahead of herself there!" Finally, mercifully, she released me from the prison between her tits, stumbling slightly backwards. "It's just that you're soooo cute! And a wittle boy like you is going to get lost in the woods without someo-," she hiccuped, "some~one to show you the way!" She was grinning, a bit dizzy, holding onto me with both arms now just to stay steady. "Besides, at your age... you need an adult along for the trip, or they're gonna take that permission slip right outta your wittle hands!"
"W-Well..." I kicked the old oak floorboards a little. She wasn't wrong. If I couldn't find anyone else who wanted to party up with me, Alyssa would have to do. "Okay, fine," I mumbled, "you can come. I guess."
She immediately grabbed my wrist, dragging me out of the guild tavern, through the lobby to the exit. "Great! Come on, little adventurer~!"
"But don't we need a quest? And aren't you kinda drunk?" I protested, still being led along.
"Quest~? No, no, you don't need one! At your age, I'm your quest!" We paused at the door, the receptionist raising a brow at this new team. "Oh wait, no, I do have a quest I'm already working on! Jay kay, we can take care of tha~t!" She waved her free hand in the air. "And as for being drunk, I'm not that drunk! Besides," she tilted her head towards me, smiling wickedly, "I'm always, heheh... kinda tipsy... I don't really like adventure without some good booze!"
I gulped nervously. This "Alyssa" woman seemed like the exact opposite of reliable. Still, she was my adventuring partner for now. Maybe there was still some cool adventures in store! I mean, she did have some kind of quest she wanted to finish. "Um... Alyssa? What's the quest you're already doing?"