Tamamo-no-Mae, also known as Lady Kayo, is a powerful fox-spirit trickster that has wantonly used and abused mortals for centuries. Disguising, beguiling, enchanting, and exploiting her away across Asia and its surrounding islands, the beautiful vixen had recently settled in Japan, infiltrating the royal court of Emperor Toba. The nine-tailed kitsune is fond of deception, and is also an incredibly powerful sorceress. She has proven herself more than capable of fending off any mortal challenger that threatened her ruthless ploys. For decades, the duplicitous fox woman went on conducting her debauched and hedonistic usury of hapless humans, until almost a week after the winter solstice, as a new force entered the isles of Japan.
Jesuit missionaries from Portugal had spread the word of Jesus in Japan, but more importantly, they also spread the tale of Saint Nicholas, or as the Portuguese priests called him "Sinterklaas." As faith in the jolly old man spread, so too did his inexorable gaze of Judgement from the North Pole. As he magically scried upon the murderous, ruthless, and needlessly cruel deeds of the cunning kitsune Lady Kayo, his proclamation was clear: Tamamo-no-Mae had been a very, very bad girl this Christmas. The only thing to be decided now, was how jolly old Saint Nick was going to punish the proud fox spirit. He decided on a layered approach, to break the haughty spirit of the vixen trickster utterly. A warped smile slowly spread across Santa's mouth, revealing his stained, cracked teeth. As he began laughing, the cackling shaking about his disheveled, white beard, a plan crystalized in his head. He knew how to make it a merry season for all the good girls and boys of this new land, under his protection.
Lady Kayo retreated to her final refuge, a carefully staked out font of magical power that she had painstakingly attuned to her own magical energies. Something had been hounding her relentlessly over the past week, disrupting every carefully managed machination she had devised over decades of careful scheming. As her plans and hidden nature were brought to light in the royal court of Emperor Toba, Lady Kayo realized she was dealing with a powerful hidden enemy. The nine-tailed fox spirit retreated to her inner sanctum, to recuperate and plan her next move. More importantly, she was devising a trap, hoping to lure her hidden foe into an unfair fight. Tamamo-no-Mae meditated above the coruscating magical waves of the cave pool inside her hidden lair, the steaming waters fed by a hot volcanic geyser. The misty cave interior was enchanted with all manner of detection wards, designed to immobilize and reveal infiltrators, but it was her incredible vulpine hearing that alerted the fox woman to the incoming threat.
Her large, fluffy ears twitched, as she detected a leather, hobnailed boot brazenly striding over the delicate pools of her treasured magical cavern. She wrinkled her nose at the smell of the fat, human interloper, dressed in a red coat that stank of sickly, toxic sweat, and alcohol. Was this her foul foe? She realized this must be a profound act of trickery, as Lady Kayo cast her magical senses about the cavern, trying to discern the nature of this maneuver. The swaying old man sauntered forward, lightly stroking his big, white beard as he stopped, stood, and spoke aloud, "Lady Kayo, I've heard you've been having a hard time getting into the Christmas spirit as of late. Doesn't it make your old heart hurt, to spread so much misery, when you could be using your powers for good, instead? I'll give you one last chance Missy, repent for your naughty ways, before it's too late-" but Santa could only barely finish before the kitsune unleashed a lightning-quick volley of magical attacks.
The dark cavern shone brightly, as Lady Kayo summoned scythes of prismatic energy, which slammed into Santa's blubbery chest, ripping the big man asunder. But as her foe fell apart into pieces, a cold-chill ran up the ancient fox spirit's spine. She focused her depleted magical scrying energies on the crushed human before her, to see that there was nothing but a pile of smashed-apart coal where her strange rival once stood, as she suddenly smelled an intense waft of alcohol behind her. The last thing Lady Kayo could make out was a throaty grunt of triumph, as a large velvet sack descended over her head. Gravity suddenly reversed, and she shuddered with outrage as large, calloused hands roughly shoved her flailing, fluffy tails in behind her. She scrambled to rip her way out of the big bag with her sharp vulpine claws, but suddenly found herself too weak to pierce the unnaturally strong fabric.
Lady Kayo tried to focus, and banish the rising sense of panic from her mind as she was jostled about to-and-fro in her dark confines. Schemes and ploys desperately raced through her mind, but she couldn't think of any plausible course of action, given how little she knew about this enigmatic old warrior. Even more worrying, the magical fox spirit's powers seemed somehow nullified in this cramped, humiliating gunny, which smelled of mold and spoiled milk. Hours passed in her moving cloth prison, as Kayo feverishly passed the time trying again and again to summon even the most meager magical emanation, but failed to produce even a flicker of energy. For the first time in many, many centuries, the mighty vixen Tamamo-no-Mae was feeling a genuine sense of fear in her duplicitous heart. She longingly held onto the hope that her powers would return if the big, red-coated man opened the velvet draw-string imprisoning her, giving her a chance to strike. The fox woman heard muffled noises outside the velour sack for the first time, and prepared every muscle in her lithe, beautiful body for combat.
Santa raced through time back towards the modern era, and crept into the Sato residence with care, noticing the scent of spiced, fried chicken wafting in the air. His heart warmed, as he saw a large bucket of KFC tied in red ribbon, with a note besides saying "For Santa" in crude English letters. The heart-felt gift warmed Santa's irregularly-beating heart, which was festively wreathed in dangerously clogged arteries. Santa shook his head ruefully, thinking about the sad fate of the young man residing here. Akira Sato was born of mixed parentage to a Japanese woman and an English teacher from overseas, and his mother had successfully cut Akira's father out of his life after divorcing him, using Japan's favorable maternal laws to maintain total custody. But after his mother's untimely death, the young Akira began withdrawing from Japanese society more and more, lapsing into the 'Hikikomori' lifestyle of extreme social isolation and escapism. But Santa could see into this wayward young lad's heart, and knew that all Akira needed was some feminine care reintroduced into his life, or something. Santa wasn't sure about any of this really, he was just winging it at this point, and very drunk. But most important of all, Saint Nicholas realized this would really fuck with the kitsune's head, so he decided to just go with it. He smiled a big, warm smile, as a large Japanese Otaku gingerly crept into the cramped living room, gaping at the sight of Santa Claus. "Hello Akira Sato, we need to talk. You've been a very good boy this year."
As the drawstring slowly slacked, Lady Kayo coiled every muscle in her lithe, vulpine body, ready to pounce and unleash a hell-storm of magical carnage. She tore out of the opened sack, and landed clumsily below a gaudily decorated, fake tree. Her slit fox pupils scanned the room warily, her big amber eyes narrowing as she tried to gauge the situation, confusion overwhelming her. Somehow, during her abduction, Lady Kayo's elegant silk kimono had been swapped for a restrictive, frilly, French maid's uniform. She was in a strange room with her red-coated enemy and another man, even taller and fatter than her hated foe. The fox woman looked between the two men in confusion, as her eyes were drawn to the other human's neck and cheeks, which were speckled with an unsightly mane of curling hair, as she directed her magical onslaught at the new target, who sported a ridiculous 'neckbeard.' The nine-tailed kitsune poured everything she had into a powerful destructive spell, extending her clawed hands forward in a threatening magical Kata. Her efforts produced no noticeable effect, as Lady Kayo's large fox ears visibly drooped in fear and disappointment.
The big, bearded half-Japanese man ambled forward, equally confused by the situation, but instantly enamored by the beautiful appearance of the poised, fierce-looking fox woman desperately staring at him, her claws and fangs bared. "Go on Akira. She's all yours." Santa said simply, nodding at him paternally as he approached the cornered fox-woman, who lashed out at him with her claw-bearing hand. Lady Kayo realized that not only were her magical powers dampened by whatever trickery had befallen her, but her unnatural strength was also sapped, as her claws barely scratched across the timid man's face, struggling to pierce the thick coils of greasy beard-hair that enshrouded his visage. Lady Kayo had no time to react, as a sudden look of crazed fury flashed across the hulking Otaku's bulbous face, and he quickly popped her in the cheek, shrieking "DON'T FUCKING SCRATCH!" before his furious expression suddenly faltered, and he leaned forward, gently cradling the fox woman's face as her pale cheek began to swell. Lady Kayo had never experienced such pain before in her life, the fox spirit normally inured to the vicissitudes of mortals, as her cheek throbbed with the pain of mortality, and the full implications of her situation sank in. Defeated, overwhelmed, humiliated, and sapped of all her carefully cultivated powers, the beautiful fox woman began to weep.
"Shhh, shhh s-sorry, p-please don't cry miss! I-I-I k-k-know how to make it all better!" Akira stuttered out, as Santa corrected him "Akira, Akira please. Lady Kayo is your wife now, by right of Christmas. It's important to show a woman her place, or you'll end up having a bitch wife that throws away years of carefully curated, hidden-camera bathroom footage of prime elven hussies," Santa finished with surprising specificity. The pair were too distracted to pay much mind, however. Kayo was busy nursing the swelling lump on her once-beautiful left cheek-bone, crying sullenly, as the Otaku brought out an oblong cardboard box containing a cooperative fantasy board-game. The sweating young man began wordlessly setting up the complex game pieces and cards, as the fox woman looked around at the strange scene, wondering mournfully about what she was going to do. She barely registered as her pimple-faced new 'husband' insistently shoved a scantily-clad female game-piece in her face, saying "T-take it, y-you're the r-r-rogue, she's the f-fighter's wife in the game's l-l-lore." Tamamo-no-Mae looked up confusedly at the fat, surprisingly strong man, lamely replying "But I don't want to be a rogue, I don't even understand-" before she was shoved to the ground by Akira, gasping for breath as the air was knocked out of her chest. "NO! I ALWAYS GET TO BE THE FIGHTER! HE'S THE ONLY CLASS THAT ROLLS A D8 FOR DAMAGE!" his stutter disappearing as his voice rose several octaves. Santa smiled warmly at the scene before him, walking up to the new couple with a smug expression on his face. Santa nodded to Akira, and leaned down to Kayo, the overwhelming stench of cheap whiskey making her wrinkle her cute nose, as the fat man whispered "Welcome to hell, bitch," before leaving Lady Kayo to her fate at the hands of Akira Sato.