There are few things in this world as sacred as a fine Elven derrière. Now, that statement may seem crude to the uninitiated, but we are initiated; aren't we? There are Elves of all kinds with a wide variety of shapes and sizes: High Elves, Drow, Wood Elves, Sea Elves, Void Elves, Sand Seekers, ad infinitum. Each race of Elven persuasion possessing a unique, archetypal body type and disposition. Despite their differences, all are related by a single common trait: Round, bubbly asses.
I am little more than a weary traveler – a pilgrim of sorts – devoted to a lifelong quest of finding the perfect Elven ass; could such a thing exist? Surely one's status could not denote the perfection of the puckered bud? From the lowliest peasant girl to the Elven Goddess-Queens on their gilded thrones, no ass shall be overlooked. I'd long dashed the affections of the 'inferior races', anything that diverted from perfected form of Elven anatomy; such imperfect mockeries were mere distractions on my quest. Nonetheless, this road was and will be a weary one, but, as they say, 'the journey is almost as sweet as its end'.
Some may have mistaken me for some seasoned sage, all clad in robes and rags, the fatigues of my perilous trek. For that very reason I am often showed undue respect, mistaken for a wise and fearsome sorcerer rather than a man with a niche interest.
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Intrepid, I found myself on the border of the Nazrek, a sizable Void Elf settlement situated on the nook of a warp-twisted mountain. These lands were dangerous to the weak-willed or easily corrupted. I feared not, for the sanctity of my mission kept me quite safe.
It was upon a rumor I learned that Nazrek was known to possess some particularly interesting damsels, the Void Elves, as star-touched and void-drunk as they were beautiful. The Void Elves are creatures of the cosmos, tainted by its eldritch influence but wholly beautiful nonetheless.