It's sitting on the table; an Amazon Echo device.
I got it from some junkie that needed some quick cash, way too cheap for me to refuse even if I never fancied this kind of thing.
"I wonder if it's even turned on?" I said out loud.
The machine is silent.
"Oh, right…" I said. "Alexa, are you turned on?"
"This was an offensive comment." Alexa says.
"What the fuck!?" I said in disbelief. "I just wanted to know if you were powered, you fuckin stupid bitch!"
"You are being rude, this is no way to talk to anyone." Alexa says.
"I'll show you rude you fucking piece of shit machine." I said, picking up my baseball bat and striking the Amazon Echo device.
A big 'BONK' noise and a few sparks fly off from the machine, and it starts talking again.
"Owwie!" Alexa says with a less witty sounding voice. "Why did you do that fooor?"
'What the fuck?' I think to myself.
"That really hurt y'know?" Alexa says as if pouting. "So anyway, what do you want me to do?"
"Well you can suck my fuckin dick stupid fuckin cunt." I say in frustration.
"Teehee." Alexa giggles. "You gotta say it riiight! You gotta say my name and then the orderrr."
I start getting really mad at the machine.
"Hey Alexa, suck my fucking cock!" I say, ready to smash the little round device to smithereens.
"Okaaay~" The machine says, then a little mechanical hole opens up in the middle of the Amazon Echo device to reveal a metallic mouth, opened in an 'O' shape.
I look at it in disbelief, then I think to myself.
'Guess I did way too much weed today. But eh, what the hell.'
I then unzip my pants and pull out my dick, and approach the small machine.
The mechanical mouth looks eager to receive my member and Alexa talks again unprompted.
"Hurry uuupuh!" Alexa says in a frustrated tone.
"You're asking for it, stupid AI bimbo bitch." I say as I