It's Christmas Eve. All the family has come together to celebrate: your father Joe, your mother Peggy, your elder sister Jennifer, her Arab boyfriend Ahmed, and you. You're sitting in the living room, talking, and listening to some old-school Christmas carols. Both your mum and your dad seem to be very happy. Your sister looks bored, as usual. She told everybody that she wants to go to a party later on and has already dressed up and put on her makeup: she looks like a wannabe porn star with her dark eyeliner, her red lips, the silly tank top, her slutty hot pants and those hip biker boots. If you were her dad, you wouldn't allow her to leave the house like that, but your father seems to be okay with it. "Darling, you look beautiful," he says, smiling at your sister, "you definitely will be a head-turner at the party. Don't you think so, Peggy?" Your mother smiles as well, "Oh, yes. You look great, Jennifer. But always remember that Jesus doesn't like pre-marital vaginal intercourse." She gives Ahmed the evil eye before she continues, "handjobs, blowjobs and even anal sex are okay, darling, but keep your virginity intact." Your sister rolls her eyes and hugs her boyfriend: "I know, mum. I always carry a bottle of lube with me, just in case. And Ahmed promised me that he'll only fuck my ass." Your father smiles proudly: "That's my girl. Like they say in the Boy Scouts: 'Be prepared.' I'm so proud of you, Jennifer."

This can't be true. Your family is a total nightmare, and this Ahmed guy looks like some Muslim terrorist on CNN. You cannot understand why your sister is together with him. However, it doesn't matter. Time to unpack the gifts. Your mum hands your dad a little box. "Is it what I think it is?" your dad grins as he opens the box. "Yes, oh darling. That's so sweet of you that you didn't forget to stock up with my viagra pills. I can't wait to take one and show you what a stud I am." He hugs your mother and hands her her gift as well. "Oh, Joe," she smiles as she unwraps it and takes out a brand new butt plug. She kisses him on the lips, "Oh, darling, you're the best. My old butt plug just doesn't fit anymore. My rectum has worn out over the time. After all, I'm not twenty anymore." Your dad nods understandingly, "I know, Peggy. This butt plug is almost twice the size of your old one. You'll love it."

Your sister unwraps her gifts. She got a black G-string and a dildo. "Really? Another dildo?" she asks, clearly disappointed. Your mother reprimands her: "Darling, the poor little children in Africa would be happy if they got a dildo for Christmas. Just show some gratitude." Your father nods approvingly. Jennifer turns to Ahmed who simply shrugs: after all, he is an Arab infidel who doesn't celebrate Christmas at all. And now it's your turn. You unwrap your gift. Oh, wow. It's a baseball glove. "Really?" you ask. "You do know that I'm not even interested in baseball? I wanted a new high-end gaming PC." Your father looks at you solemnly before he answers: "Bob, gaming is the devil's work. You know that."

The festive mood is interrupted by a loud knocking on the door. "Who may it be?" your father asks innocently, standing up and walking to the door. He opens it and you hear a loud voice hollering. "Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas, tovarish." A fat, reeking Santa Claus enters your living room. Both your mum and your dad hug him, and the three of them start groping each other like some megahorny perverts. Santa Claus pulls down your mother's dress and starts kissing her saggy breasts, pressing his face deep down her cleavage and making funny noises. Her hands are playing with his red trousers, stroking his crotch. Your dad kisses Santa Claus's neck, biting into his ear. You look towards your sister Jennifer who apparently has no clue what's going on either. "What the fuck?" she says, watching your mother kneeling in front of Santa Claus and unzipping his red trousers. Your mother pulls down Santa Claus's trousers and his big, dirty penis pops up and smacks against her face. A thick layer of smegma covers its tip. You can smell its stench from three meters away and start to gag. Jennifer turns to her boyfriend Ahmed who is grinning like some total idiot.

Your mother looks at the big dirty penis in front of her with a mixture of lust and disgust. The while Santa Claus takes her new butt plug and investigates it thoroughly. "Do you want me to stick this into your butt hole, dorogoy?" he asks your mother and adds: "I really like the Amerikanski way of life. All your wives are huge sluts. Ho ho ho!"