Even though she was a lot of things, Jane would personally describe herself as shy. Not socially awkward, criminally timid, or debilitatingly reserved, just shy. The aptness of such a description could be argued, but she certainly was not a social butterfly. Too few people knew her to count as people in her life. She lived alone in an apartment and had a private telephone line that collected dust for most days in a year. She was even the only occupant of the building she lived in. Without fail, Jane was always by herself.
She had always felt that she was different from other people from a young age. As a child, she was an outcast, raised in a small town with her parents. While the other kids always played together, Jane never felt like she shared anything in common, so she never joined in. Neither did they invite her to. The trend continued throughout her teenage years, and by the time she reached her late twenties, she had no friends to speak of.
When she was twenty-two, her parents died in a car accident. Her mother and father were driving home from a dinner party, under the influence. They were killed instantly when they crashed into a telephone pole, her mother was driving and took the full brunt of the collision, her father killed by blunt injury to the head from debris. With only a small inheritance to her name, Jane was left alone in the world, left to to rent an apartment and buy a car for transportation.
No one ever told Jane what it would be like to be totally alone. Her parents had never prepared her for it, and she never even thought to ask. All they had ever done was be there. Then one day they weren't, serving as her introduction to the concept. She had never been without her parents, they were her rock, and the only motivator for her life up to that point and now without them she was lost. It felt like she didn't belong anywhere, and there was no way to fix it.
"Hm." Whenever the silence had become unbearable, she picked up the habit of making noise to fill the void. On the sofa she sat, her eyes focused on the television. It had been playing in the background for a long time, but her thoughts prevented her from truly acknowledging it until now. It was one of those old CRT televisions with a big square screen, blaring out a gameshow in black and white. Jane couldn't remember if it came with a remote control.
Usually, Jane would sleep during times like this. Sleep was the only way she could cope with her loneliness, the only time she felt like she could be with someone. She dreamed of many things; of being desired, skilled at multiple professions, but most frequently she dreamed of having a friend. She dreamed of sharing her life with someone. She dreamed of not being alone.
This time, however, she wasn't going to go to sleep right away. Something about the glare of the TV didn't sit right with her. Or perhaps it was the darkness of the room, or the position of the moon beaming into her room from the window behind her. Whatever it was, it manifested a powerful desire, one that had never been so strong in her life. A desire to change her destiny, to have a friend and share life with another.
Jane turned approached her window, looking out. Millions of stars shone in the night sky, visible even as as street lights shone brightly. The city was quiet, more still than she'd ever seen it. It was as if she was looking at a beautiful painting. There was beauty in the darkness of the sky, and comfort in the light of the stars.
Her sadness turned to rage. It was finally enough: no more isolation in her apartment, no more watching television. Her goal was no longer to make it to the end of each day, but to meet new people.
"I'm going to go out," she said aloud. Her voice was quiet and squeaky, but to have one at all was an achievement. A smile broke out on her face, her mind was made up.
Jane would be going out to find a friend.
Tomorrow morning. It was really late, after all.
***
The next day, she was up bright and early, a stark contrast to her usual routine. She did her hair and put on her makeup, getting dressed in her nicest clothes, a black t-shirt and some jeans. Putting on her favourite pair of sneakers, mulling over her new objective. Not really knowing where people go to make friends, she decided on going to go to the mall. She had never been to the mall before, or any shopping centre of any kind. She didn't know what to expect, but surely there were enough people there for one of them to want to hang out with her, right?
A few minutes later, she barrelled out the door to the car park, entering her vehicle and pulling out to head to the mall. By the time it came into view beyond her dashboard, she was already nervous. It was a huge, multi-floor building that looked like a small city in itself. She parked on the street just outside and exited her car, looking up at the tall glass and concrete structure. To say it was intimidating would be an understatement, Jane's motivation was being sapped with every second she took to study the architecture. She breathed in, and walked in through the automatic doors.
The mall inside was even bigger than it appeared from the outside, completely packed with civilians. There were thousands, all heading in different directions, some on their phones or chatting with other individuals firmly planted in the chaotic web of their lives. People of all sizes and shapes wearing different clothes and walking at different speeds. The sound was deafening, hundreds of conversations, music, advertisements blaring. Jane felt as if she were drowning in the expanse of the place. She didn't know how to handle it at first.
Grounding herself was necessary. Regardless of the circumstances, she wanted to stick to her word. She needed to speak with someone. Above all else, Jane didn't want to be alone.
It was time to make a friend.