You are Sam Quincey, an 18-year-old boy in his first year of college.

You're the introverted type, but you've been lonely for so long that you're going to do something about it. You sign up for the online blind dating service BlindEye. With BlindEye, people are matched based on their chemistry scores. Once matched, people can communicate via their messaging system. Real names and pictures are not used, so their first date is truly "blind". You have signed up with the username "Serious-S".

Recently, you were matched with a user named "MissyQ". You hit it off with MissyQ, and have shared a number of pleasant conversations with her (and a bit of flirting). MissyQ is an older woman looking for someone young. Luckily for you, you like older women.

After a few days of swapping messages, you decide to meet up at a local cafe for your first date. MissyQ messages you and says "You'll know me by my bright red dress!"

The day finally comes, and you drive to the cafe. You take a few moments to prepare, and enter the cafe, looking around for that tell-tale bright red dress.

However, the only person you spot wearing a bright red dress is... your mother, sitting at a table alone. Her hair is done, and she looks, well, kinda nice.

Confused and stunned, you lock eyes with mom, who looks at you with a furrowed brow. Is she MissyQ? You've shared a lot of messages with MissyQ—some very... flirtatous messages. You approach to mom's table before asking, "Are you... are you MissyQ?"

Your mom, eyes darting, face turning beet red, says "