Pirates scurried around on the deck, preparing for battle as they worked to ready their ship for launch. The sky was dark and cloudy, with only a few stars visible through the thick fog that blanketed everything outside of the light from our lanterns.
Captain Baker, the aged, white-haired captain of this vessel, stood at the helm, barking orders to his crew. I stood next to him, one of the new recruits who had been hired recently. I had dressed as a pirate should: all black clothes, leather boots, and an eye patch over my right eye.
"Any moment, out from the fog, will be a ship flyin' the flag o' Spain," Captain Baker said. "It's a matter of who spots who first."
"Cap'n Baker?" I asked him quietly.
"Ye? What is it, lad? Getting sea legs already?" he replied, looking down at me with a smile on his face.
"Why does Spain only send animal girls to man their ships?" I asked.
"Mmmm… Well, ye see, lad," Captain Baker began, leaning toward me conspiratorially. "Spain's overflowing with animal girls. They breed too much, the country can't afford to feed them all. So they've started filling all the cruddy jobs, sailor positions, and such." He gave me a wink. "But to horny pirates such as our little band here, they just look like tasty treats!"
He chuckled at his own joke.
"Are we going to not only take their treasure, but also the women?" I asked.
"Aye! That's the plan," he answered with a grin. "A double victory. But most of all, it makes for good writin' material. We're all gonna be postin' stories about this voyage when we get back home."
"So this entire boat is full of writers? It's not just me?" I asked.
"Aye! Every member o' our crew has a pen in 'is hand or purse," Captain Baker said proudly. "We pillage women, grab treasure, and write about it all!"
I really never knew. Way up at the crow's nest, I could hear someone yelling into a speaking tube, trying to alert the other ships that there was danger ahead. The fog had cleared enough for us to make out shapes moving in the water.
"The Spanish Animal Girls haven't spotted us! They're about five minutes ahead us now!" yelled the voice from above.
"I'll bring us in range! We'll get the jump on em!" Captain Baker ordered. "Lad, if this goes well, they should surrender without fightin'. If not, ye best be ready."
"I have worries about the part where I'm supposed to... y'know, take an animal girl and... do things to her..." I said nervously.
"Don't worry, lad," he reassured me. "I assume yer not one for respe- er, raping. And don't worry, ye won't have to. If you want a loving animal girl, we'll let ye take one an' give her a new life and stuff."
"Will I be able to win the love of a beautiful animal girl by taking care of her?" I asked hopefully.
"Aye!" Captain Baker looked back down at me. "And onboard that ship, you'll have th' best selection of them ye could think of, lad. Ye'll find they take the aspects of the animals they are based off of. Dog girls act loyal an' cute; cat girls are shy an' sexy..." Captain Baker trailed off, looking at the shadow of the ship approaching us through the fog. "If yer lucky enough t'win their heart, she'll treat ye well."
I nodded silently as I listened to the captain's wise advice. "I'll keep that in mind, Cap'n."
We had now gotten close enough to the ship, finally able to see the animal girls on deck, they seemed to be panicking and running around in their Spanish sailor outfits, some far fancier than what I was wearing.
Captain Baker stepped away from the helm, pulling his sword from its sheath. "Showtime, lad! Remember, if they surrender, we get to save ourselves the bloodshed!"
I gripped my cutlass tightly and made sure it was firmly secured in its scabbard, ready at any moment to strike down anyone who dared stand against us.
"We got 'em! They're surrendering already, no cannons firein'! Th' drop-off is comin' up!"
The ship came closer, until it was right next to us. The animal girls were huddled together in fear, but then they saw us standing there with our swords drawn and ready to fight. All assortment of species were there, common to exotic: cat girls stood with lowered heads, a larger cow girl with strained clothing covered her face, a few rabbit girls nervously shook, as if they were going to bolt overboard at any second.